BULLIED

Submission 888

I wouldn't say I was exactly bullied, but I have always been teased and called names and often told I was weird. As I entered Year 7, my life completely changed.I had to do much more homework and started getting stressed out with everything around me. Also, there were many family issues going on and I was just not ready for any more drama in my life. Then I started getting bullied. Cyber bullied.

When I first got my phone I was quite excited. I had a Facebook account only though. My mother always made sure that I don't add anyone I don't know. I didn't even wan't to do that. So all I did was practically add my family and friends. Once I found one of my cousins and added them. We started regularly chatting, since we were of the same age, He was very addicted to social media, and sometimes even sent me messages in class. Until one day, everything changed.

My cousin started asking more about myself like where I love now and stuff like that (He's in the U.S. I am in Australia). Since I wasn't very close to him and we never really met each other I found it normal that he asks things like: how do you like school? Do you have a crush on someone? Did you watch that latest episode of this show?

I used to talk to him about the amount of homework and family issues and he always listened to me and gave advice. Best cousin ever, was what I thought.

One day, I found a text message he sent me saying:

You bloody idiot, I hate you :(

Then every day he sent me something worse, and even started swearing. I replied many times by asking him what happened to him, and he told me that he just hates and because he felt like it. He started saying how weak I am and how helpless. Eventually, I started getting scared because he threatened me. I didn't dare tell my parents and my mum doesn't look through my phone since she believes I can make the right choices. Usually when people get bullied, they sleep less and eat less and their grades go down. But for me, it was the complete opposite.

I started eating more and gained more weight and became a very deep sleeper. I always tried to smile since I hated showing people my feelings. But being called weird at school wasn't helping much either.

I started having suicidal thoughts, and one day, I decided I was ready for it. I went into the bathroom and locked the door. I cried for a bit then a got my dad's blaze and started cutting. I kept on cutting. I then stopped. I was really scared. I knew it wasn't worth it. I knew I was more worth than that. I knew that I am at least more important of an existence than my heartless cousin.

I washed the blood and put a band aid. No one was home that day. I claimed that I was cutting up salad and cut myself by accident.

I deleted all my chats and asked my mum if that was my cousin's account. she looked through it and said that he already had one. So, the whole account that I thought belonged to my cousin was actually some fake account. I was a bit relieved.

I am still called weird today but I don't take it seriously. I have a lot of friends although I know that I don't fit in. I do get excellent marks though and know that I will get better at dealing with people.

I don't regret this experience but would rather want to always remember it, so that one day I am able to face all those horrible, heart-braking memories confidently and would one day be able to say "I was bullied, but I am still here, moving forward in life, hoping to make a difference".

I talk with my REAL cousin on his account and we get along pretty well. We fight sometimes, especially about why mangoes taste so bad for me. He says that my taste buds have an illness that only mangoes can cure, but however much he tries to convince me that mangoes taste good, I never budge.

It's nearly the end of Year 7 and I am glad about life now. I hope my story encourages you to live on without having to worry about things so much. And always try to have someone you can talk to, you know. Like your parents or friends. Or maybe even on the internet or that weird kid that no one approaches. Who knows? Maybe you found your best friend. :)