Kwentong Kolehiyo

Drunk Call

I remember closing my eyes whenever I pass by that certain bar. I hate seeing that bar. I hate that it brings so much memories and too much pain with just a single glance. I used to tell myself that maybe if I close my eyes and refuse to see it, maybe the past didn't happened.

I clearly remember. It was a little past two when I was awaken by the shrill tone of my phone ringing. I didn't even bothered knowing who was calling me at an ungodly hour.

"Hello?" I said in a very hoarse voice. Nobody answered and that's the only time I looked at the screen to know who was calling. I blink thrice when I saw you name. I kept on telling myself that it's a dream. You? Calling me? I must be dreaming. It was weeks after we stopped talking to each other. After I found out that you had another girl, and that you lied so many times, I was so broken. There was too much pain and the only way to lessen it was to cut all ties with you. So you calling me now made my heart stopped beating. I breathe and decided to speak again.

"Hello? Andyan ka ba?" I asked in a more clear tone.

"Babe? (Not our endearment) Nagising ba kita?" You asked in a very drunk voice. And there and then I started to feel pain again. Hearing your voicr after weeks of not talking almost put me over the edge.

"No. Okay lang. Bakit? Lasing ka ba?" I asked in a small tone.

"No. Nakainom lang. Nandito ako sa *name of bar*" You said and I could feel your smile. My heart sank when I heard your answer. Sabi ko sa sarili ko. Ayan ka na naman. Pumaparty ka na naman.

"Ahh. Sinong kasama mo?" I asked though I'm not really interested.

"Wala. Ako lang."

"Umuwi ka na kaya? Gabi na oh?" I told you wishing you would listen.

"May itatanong lang sana ako." You said. And that simple sentence made me nervous.

"A-ano yun?" I said.

"I'm sorry babe. Wala na ba talaga? Hindi na ba pwede?" You asked. And those questions are exactly the ones that I don’t want to answer. Masakit pa. Hindi ko kayang tanggapin na pinagpalit mo na naman ako sa iba. Na nambabae ka na naman.

"Sorry. Hindi ko pa kaya." I simply said. Tears are now pooling in my eyes.

"Babe please. Uuwi na ako. Or puntahan mo ko. Aayusin ko na." You said pleading.

"Masyado nang late. Di na pwede. Umuwi ka na." I said dodging your plead. You kept on asking me to forgive you. You kept saying sorry. But at that time, nothing could ease the pain I'm feeling. Di kayang pawiin ng pagmamakaawa mo yung sakit na paulit-ulit kong nararamdaman araw-araw.

After a while, you agreed on going home. You asked me to stay on the line while you were on the road so that you won't fall asleep. I stayed until you were home, until you were in your room and you're lying on your bed. You didn't asked another question about us again. When you were sleepy you said your goodnight and I said mine. I ended the call and then I fell asleep.

The next morning, there was a message from you. Sabi mo, "Sorry babe. Natawagan kita kaninang madaling araw. Sobrang lasing na kasi ako. Naistorbo pa tuloy kita. Ahm, sorry. Wag mo nalang intindihan yung mga pinagsasabi ko. Okay lang ako. Sorry and goodbye."

I re-read that message for countless times until I saw a tear falling to my phone. That was when I realized I am crying. All along I thought you were sincere since you were drunk and all. The funny thing is, I almost believed you again. Di na ako nadala. Di na ako nasanay na sinasaktan mo ako. Tanga ko no? Kasi umasa akong nagsisisi ka talaga, na ako padin yung gusto mo. Umasa akong gusto mong umayos tayo. Na ako ulit ang pinipili mo.

Here I thought a person is honest when he/she is drunk. I forgot that a person could also forget everything he did when he/she is drunk as fuck.

Taken For Granted 
2010 
AMV College of Accountancy